i dunno wat i'm feeling ryt nw...
lyk so many tings have been thru my mind..
m i doing the ryt ting to go to sch...?
yeah i wanna study.. i do...

hmm...
i wanna go back to sch nt to c tt taufik..?
wat do i get..?
waste my tym...
wanna get a higher nitec cert. then my dream to go to poly..
ahakz.. to prove my mom wrong...
my mind was set then but i dunno y i always take the wrong path...
haizz.. jux wasting precious tym of my life...

another reason y i wanna study is tt i can earn sm cash as well...
i wanna work while study...
i wanna get away frm hm smtym too... atleast being in sch kept me occupied frm
tings tt i dont want to tink abt...
haizz...

wat m i suppose to do..? i ave lots of unanswered questions.. but whom can i turn to..?
jux had to used my peanut brain n solve myself.. i wish tt there's sm1 who can guide me..
i can ask for his help.. for hw long..?
i cant depend on him.. i have to! trying to 4gt him... but i cant.. by nt contacting him mayb tings will b better... will it..? n i such a coward..? m i leaving jux lyk tt..? n i running away frm probs..?
well sm1 told me tt it's best tt i dont bother him anymore... it's for the best of both of us.. i cant..
i'm trying nt to tink abt him.. but he's lyk 24/7 in my mind..
i wanna go out n meet ppl.. mayb guys.. so i can really 4gt him... b'cos of me he has tis stupid probs.. if he doesn't noe me... he will b a gd guy.. better then he is nw.. i turn him bad.. i make him wat he is nw.. he mom said he wasn't lyk tis b4.. it's all my fault.. for tt nite at the beach...

my mom wants me married. dunno y.. jux hope tt since i started sch she will 4get abt it for nw...
well, i realise tt she wans to matchmake me... for my own gd..
well, i was thinking... my grans did matchmake her wif my dad.. n guess wat's the outcome..? tis type of family...
is she matchmaking me to make my life miserable lyk hers..?
is she doing tis cos she had a bf then n she had to get engaged wif my dad n she didnt get wat she wants...
she thinks tt it's the best for me..? well her mom said tt my dad is the best for her...?
i really dunno lh...
GOD! PLS I DOWAN TO GET MARRIED.. I ONLY WANNA GET MARRIED WIF THIS SPECIAL GUY IN MY HEART. IF HE DOESN'T WANT TO.. I RATHER NT GET MARRIED FOR ETERNITY...........i beg u....

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