the world is not all about sunshine and rainbows

title: finally it's gonna b..
date: Monday, August 6
time:23:38

a freaking long entry!

finally i'm gg to start typing away...
bn away for too long lah...
so.. hmm let's c..
hmm.. whr shud i start?

so, i tot evryting's gonna change..
lyk seriously for the better..
i wonder smtyms
y do we exists?
y shud we ave to go thru evryting?
part of life?
hmm.. i cnt believe tt u actually admire me for getting over hym..
n frankly i aven't..
seriously..

gonna b 2 yrs huh?
yeah.. but?
i'm still nt over it..
i jux go wif the flow...
cos i dunno wat to expect...
i cnt hope for aniting to happen..
cn i?
cos i noe it'll nvr happen..
even if it did, to b frank i wud run away frm it..

i hate to make new frens.. at the same tym i luv too...
one making new frens i get to c parts of the world tt i ave nt tasted yet..
smtyms dey wanna b more den frens..
i dun mind losing frens..
but i dowan to lose my precious ones..
i luv those who cn really understand me..
lyk seriously i cn pull u one corner n jux related watever i wanna say..
n u understand..
i hate those jackasses who hate gays!
hello dey r human beings k!
dey r my close bitches! i luv their company..
jux bcos dey r lyk tt doesnt mean tt u cn talk bad abt dem..
u aint perfect urself.. no1 is!
they din wan to b in tt wae..
i noe..
but u cnt change dem for who dey r...
niwae, drop tt topic....
i hate wat i'm feeling ryt nw..
i seriously hate it..
i may b hapi most of the tyms..
but i ave to put away tis feeling of hatred in me..

i seriouly ting being alone cn solve evryting..
but NO!
i hate tinking too much!
i hate aving trouble to slp..
i hate tis feeling of insecurity..
i hate tis watever shit i'm gg thru..
i nvr wanna hurt any1
i nvr meant to hurt u..
i nvr meant to make any1 fall for me..
i jux luv aving frens ard..

isit wrng to care for frens..?
shit! i cnt let it go..
i wish me nvr exist smtyms..
arrggh!

sori for tis entry..
i jux nd to let it go lah...
haizz.. i appreciate those who ave bn wif me..
thru evry sgl dae of my life..
for layan-ing my kecoh-rism..
my mepek-ness..

thanks! i miss u all!!
*huggies*

Cry' by Rihanna

I'm not the type to get my heart broken
I'm not the type to get upset and cry
Cause I never leave my heart open
Never hurts me to say goodbye
Relationships don't get deep to me
Never got the whole in love thing
And someone can say they love me truely
But at the time it didn't mean a thing

My mind is gone, i'm spinning round
And deep inside, my tears i'll drown
I'm losing grip, what's happening
I stray from love, this is how I feel

This time was different
Felt like, I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now i'm, in this condition
And i've, got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you'll never see me cry

Did it happen when we first kissed
Cause it's hurting me to let it go
Maybe cause we spent so much time
And I know that it's no more
I shoulda never let you hold me baby
Maybe why i'm sad to see us apart
I didn't give to you on purpose
Gotta figure out how you stole my heart

My mind is gone, i'm spinning round
And deep inside, my tears i'll drown
I'm losing grip, what's happening
I stray from love, this is how I feel

This time was different
Felt like, I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now i'm, in this condition
And i've, got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you'll never see me cry

How did I get here with you, i'll never know
I never meant to let it get so, personal
After all I tried to do, stay away from loving you
I'm broken hearted, I can't let you know
And I won't let it show
You won't see me cry

This time was different
Felt like, I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now i'm, in this condition
And i've, got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you'll never see me cry

This time was different
Felt like, I was just a victim
And it cut me like a knife
When you walked out of my life
Now i'm, in this condition
And i've, got all the symptoms
Of a girl with a broken heart
But no matter what you'll never see me cry

All my life...

i'm so hating tis song... arrgh!

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